Mother’s Day can be particularly painful if you have lost a child and even more so if you have lost your only child.
This article from the amazing blog ‘What’s Your Grief’ was written two years ago but it’s definitely worth revisiting on this difficult day.
‘What’s Your Grief?’ asked their readers to help them write a post in anticipation of Mother’s Day and together nearly 100 bereaved parents offered their thoughts. Their collective wisdom was compiled to write a heartfelt letter to bereaved mothers. Here are some beautiful insights:-
It is excruciating knowing that my child will never return to my arms. However, a mother’s love for her child doesn’t require physical presence.
I actually am normal. I’m just different now. I believe those who say they want to support me on difficult days like Mother’s Day, but part of this is accepting me as a grieving mother who will always love her deceased child.
On the one hand, I feel immense joy because I was blessed with my child and I feel gratitude for every moment I was given with them. On the other hand, the pain of missing my child – my greatest happiness, my life’s purpose, and my best friend – is intense.
This day will forever be hard for me. I live with an emptiness that no one can fill; so I may be sad, I may be unsociable, and I may need to take a break to be by myself in a quiet place. Whatever shape my grief takes on this day, please allow me to feel the way I feel and please follow my lead.
I can sense that people feel uncomfortable talking about my child and I constantly feel like the elephant in the room, but it doesn’t have to be this way. Honestly, I find it really comforting when someone talks about my child.
Be kind to yourself on Mother’s Day and if you need support the SLOW groups are open to all that have lost a child. For times and dates of forthcoming SLOW support groups link here.